Boxing girls right from the start

Blue is for boys and pink is for girls, at least that is what “they” wanted me to believe. Still, when I walk down the aisles of a department store, I know when I have arrived in the girls section … I am blinded by pink! What aren’t wrapped in the unsightly packaging are usually household appliances like a kitchen set, an easy bake oven, toy vacuum cleaners and dolls. There may be a few gender neutral toys, but the majority is not. We’ve done it. We’ve boxed our girls into being the caretakers of life, right from the beginning.

Think about the characteristics that we assign to children before they can even crawl. Boys are taught to be rough, tough, stoic and unemotional (attributes also damaging to them) while girls are expected to be delicate, fragile, and beautiful. However, these are society’s constructs which leads to the battle of the genders (Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus), even though it is not biologically based. According to Gilbert's Review of Literature (2001), female infants appear to be less emotional and vulnerable than male babies. Additionally, the author purports that females are less affected by maternal depression. Whoa, bet you didn't see that one coming! Are you telling me that the “sensitive” beings are not so sensitive after all and that biologically speaking, before adults have influence over children’s behavior, the exact opposite holds true? The bottom line is that girls start "acting" like girls and boys start “acting” like boys around the age of 2 or 3 based on the way the adults around them treat them. Now, that is the true definition of nature vs. nurture.

As children reach school age, I’m certain you’ve heard that boys excel at math and science and girls excel at verbal skills. Perhaps you were even told that growing up. Perhaps you were taught wrong. According to the National Network for Child Care (NNCC), an organization dedicated to sharing knowledge about children and child care from the vast resources of land-grant universities, researchers are now focusing on the impact that the social environment has on gender scholastic achievement. The results … well, adults are to blame, again. Think about the types of toys parents often buy their boys. They usually include tinker toys, Legos, wooden blocks, construction kits, cars, chemistry sets and even mini-machines. These types of toys allow boys to develop inherent principles relating to math and science. Usually, girls do not have the same playful experiences; therefore they continue to feel insecure about their mathematical or science abilities once they are in the classroom. The NNCC’s website asserts that even teachers, “usually unaware of their own biases, call on boys more, praise boys more for correct answers, and are more likely to ask boys for help in science and math demonstrations.” The consistent message girls get is that they are not as good as boys.

Similarly, girls are encouraged to attend college for fields that “suit” social norms, like English, Literature or Teaching. After all, isn’t that how they can succeed? False! So, as you can see, we set our girls up for a lifetime of occupations that are neither financially rewarding nor culturally influential. We set them up for failure right from the beginning, while encouraging them to succeed … or so we think.